What you can learn From Tiwa Savage/Teebillz Marriage Crash
It's been
the number one trending entertainment topic for the past one week.
After Tiwa
savage’s manager and husband, Tunji Balogun A. K. A Teebillz, went on social
media last week to call out his wife accusing her to have slept with Tuface,
Dr. Sid and Don Jazzy, amongst other serious allegations, after which he made
an attempt to commit suicide by trying to jump inside a Lagos Lagoon; Tiwa in
about 48 hours also granted an interview on camera narrating her own side of
the story.
In the
highly emotional interview, which some people believe was staged by her PR team
to attract public sympathy for her, the singer accused her husband and father
of her son of cheating whenever she was not in the country, taking cocaine,
stealing from her as a manager, involved in a 45million Naira fraud case being
investigated by the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC), amongst
other allegations.
Most people
are of the opinion that Tiwa Savage shouldn’t have gone to the extent of
revealing all the incriminating allegations about Teebillz even if those
allegations were true, as doing that shows that she was bent on destroying him,
when it’s obvious the man needed help; this was a man who wanted to commit suicide!
Many also
faulted the parts of the interview where Tiwa Savage kept mentioning that she
was the breadwinner. The truth is that men have been breadwinners from creation
without anyone complaining, should it now be a big deal to some women whenever
they find themselves in a position to provide for the family, due to
circumstances which make their men unable to be breadwinners?
Amid her
failed attempt at winning public sympathy with the interview, Tiwa was also
heavily blasted by many, especially some women folk who told her to keep her
mouth shut for saying she could not be the breadwinner and still have time to
cook for her man; according to them there are many women in this country, who
due to circumstances find themselves becoming the breadwinner and still cook
for their family. Yet, their marriages are still very intact.
All in all,
there are a couple of lessons to take home from the saga and one of them is the
fact that Teebillz has himself to be blame for his woes because he allowed his
drive for Tiwa’s success to derail him from his own personal visions (if he had
any to start with)
Lesson 1: A
man without a dream is dead
Tiwa
confessed in the interview that Teebillz work so hard and sacrificed to see her
succeed when she was trying to find her feet in the industry.
However,
after she was successful, Teebillz was not able to forge ahead with his own
personal dreams, instead he kept hanging on to Tiwa’s, and some women when they
start doing better than the man, honestly, starts to feel that their husband
does not deserve them. This was obviously one of the problems with Tiwa and
Teebillz’s marriage.
Obviously,
Tiwa expected him to do something with himself instead of just being her
manager, when she said in the interview; “I had to pay for everything so that
he can go out and hustle, and get the contracts. He didn’t have money for
diapers, but he had money to have a bi-weekly haircut, had money to pay for his
laundry.”
Teebillz
should have taken a cue from P-Square’s elder brother and manager, Jude Okoye,
who had his own record label while still managing the twins. His record label,
Northside Inc, gave birth to the sensational Dancehall star, Cynthian Morgan.
Jude is also into music directing and he is highly sought-after. It was this
side incomes that enable Jude to have his own larger-than-life personality
instead of being overshadowed by the stardom of his brothers. It was also this
knowledge that gave Jude the confidence to call his brothers’ bluff during
their recent drama.
Thefirst
lesson is, it’s totally fine to support your woman’s dream, but never lose
focus of your own dream. But unfortunately, Teebillz failed to hustle (as Tiwa
put it) for his own dream.
Lesson 2:
What goes around, comes around
It’s been
said that Karma is a Dam! That statement can’t be any truer. The announcement
of Tiwa and Teebillz’s relationship about three years ago, stirred a lot of
dust owing to the fact that Teebillz was married with two children to a woman
in the London. Therefore, Tiwa is believed to have snatched Teebillz from his
wife and children. Teebillz himself denied his wife in the London just to be
with Tiwa, a celebrity. Today, that woman has got the last laugh. Tiwa and
Teebillz have now been served a hefty dose of the bitter medicine they
concocted for the poor woman in the London.
Lesson 3:
Before you kill yourself over any man or woman, think again
I won’t say
that you should not kill yourself at all. In Charly Boy’s voice, ‘na u know
wetin make you think say the solution to your wahala na to kpeme’. Teebillz
wanted to kill himself because of Tiwa Savage, when their issues could have
been easily resolved through dialogue. If not for the miraculous intervention
of a stranger named Ani Chukwuma and Banky W and Peter Okoye who showed up in
the nick of time, we would have been saying Rest in Peace to Teebillz by now.
And Tiwa Savage would have still continued to shake her tiny “bumbum” in music
videos and on stage even before Teebillz is buried.
Or is it not
the same Tiwa whom despite the ongoing serious marriage issues, was pictured
shooting a new music video with her dancers barely 5 days of the drama which
almost had her husband committing suicide.
Just hours
ago, Tiwa was also pictured on set of a new episode of Funke Akindele’s TV
series, Jenifa’s Diary, all smiles. Although, you shouldn’t be surprised about
the Funke Akindele’s part, because you know what they say about birds of a
feather.
Not that one
expects Tiwa to go and hang herself, but here is woman who just lost her
marriage, (not a piece of jewelry) and her husband had just been rescued from
committing suicide over an issue he claimed has to do with her.
What does
all that implies to Tiwa? This is logically not the time to move on, but a time
for sober reflection. You can move on discreetly.
Lesson 4:
Never marry out of pity
Marry
someone because you truly want them, not based on pity or compensation. You are
meant to be with this person forever, and you shoud ask yourself if the reason
for which you are marrying them can sustain your interest in them forever, even
in the most violent storms of life. From the interview Tiwa Savage granted,
what she said about Teebillz working hard and sacrificing for her career shows
that she might have chosen to marry him because of that, or probably Tiwa
Savage just wanted someone to help her produce a baby, and Teebillz appeared to
be the perfect man for that purpose. If you check the part she mentioned that
she told a friend the marriage was over after Teebillz Internet rant, you would
realise that the marriage meant nothing to her in the first place.
Lesson 5: A
rotten ingredient cannot make a good meal
Marriage is
not for irresponsible people. If everything Tiwa savage said about Teebillz is
anything to believe, then aside from Tiwa’s many short-comings, Teebillz’s
irresponsible lifestyle is highgrade.
Just read
some of her accusations; “I walked in on TJ taking cocaine in my house in 1004
(Victoria Island, Lagos). I didn’t even know he takes cocaine. I walked into
the kitchen, and I saw him taking cocaine, so I screamed, and asked if that is
cocaine. HE started screaming that ‘What am I doing down here, where is the
cocaine?’ How can someone without money take cocaine? I called his parents and
complained that I can deal with weed, but cocaine, no. So I am dealing with his
alcohol problem, you come home late, infidelity, coaciane, bad debt, jealousy
over my success.”
Finally, it
is worthy of note that during the interview, when asked, Tiwa never denied
sleeping with Tuface, Don Jazzy, and Dr. Sid, as Teebillz initially accused her
of. What most people didnot observe is that, she gave a very smart and dodgy
answer there by saying that she never cheated on her husband when she replied;
“I have
never cheated on my husband. Not with Don Jazzy, Dr Sid, 2face Idibia or
anybody. I have never cheated on my husband, and Tunji knows this. He knows
that in his heart.”
The question
was supposed to be whether she slept with those people her husband said she has
slept with, and if Tiwa Savage slept with those people way before she got
married to Teebillz, then ofcourse she never cheated on her husband.
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